This is a tough word. When I was growing up there was no truth in my family. My father had affairs, my mother drank and I tried everything I could to be a good girl. My brother and sister worked hard at this too. The truth of our accomplishments mattered little to our parents. They did not deal with the truth. It was too scary; at least that's my take on it.
Ultimately in a dysfunctional family truth did not win. So I grew up with lies; that's a strong word too. You said or did whatever you had to in order to survive. My most vivid remembrance is when I told my third grade teacher, Mrs. Ervin, a lie and got caught. I told her that it was okay for me to go to a friend's house after school. My mother didn't want me to be happy and have friends; she would not have agreed to the time after school with my friend. So I lied. I got caught; the fact that I still remember that is very telling.
When you live day in and day out with lies you don't believe any other way of life exists. You lie to yourself about what is best for you. I did that when I married my first husband twice. Finally I couldn't lie to myself any more.
I have learned that it is so much better to deal with the truth than to pretend that what you are doing is working. Most of the friends I have today live that way too. The others are on their way to discovering what the word means for them. As I said at the beginning, this is a tough word.
Truth has brought me much happiness. I would not give that up for the world.
Before I fall into bed...
1 day ago